Exploration
“Rwaaarr!” I growled, mouth stretched as far as I could manage, hands and knees prowling around the messy playroom. I dodged every puzzle piece and block that threatened to leave its mark, as I made my way towards the cackling little girl across from me. I was a lion today. Yesterday I had paws and floppy ears. Yesterday was her favorite momimal. So it goes as a momma of a nearly one and a half year old. Quick on your wit and willing to teach that spongy mind at every chance. Not because you’re trying to get them to Harvard or gloat to your family about what you can only assume to be your baby-genius, but because seeing the light in their eyes glisten as they learn a new part of this world is invaluable. While it’s a privilege to steward this new world for her, it’s me who’s been unlocking hidden treasures along the way. My Steward guiding me in His gentle, Fatherly Way.
It was a rainy summer day and we had big plans to explore the reptile exhibit at our community library - along with everyone else. After wading through a packed parking lot and outrageously occupied lobby, we were politely turned away due to max capacity. In response to the many protests, the woman granting entry explained the definition of a fire hazard - so kind of her. The large group of extras trotted back down the stairs like a reptile walk of shame. The condolences from adults to children floated through the halls.
I couldn’t understand the point of this detailed planning gone astray by circumstances. Whether it was the weather or sheer excitement of an uncaged python, I wasn’t sure. Either way the event was a hit at our expense. What I did know is the number of people I’d invited in hopes of another eye-gleaming funday - bonus funday points for mom fellowship. I had single handedly been the cause of a whole group of moms dragging their kiddos, snacks in tow, through the rain, around a clogged parking lot, and right into the emotional roller coaster of canceled plans. It’s like a lightning strike at the water park or rampant stomach bug on field day.
In the turn of events, the rain had stopped and we opted for a walk. Not a hundred yards from the library slid a fat snake right towards us. Amused and a little unsettled I couldn’t help but take notice of the reptile present just for us. Today on the way to the park a baby turtle was poking his head in and out of his shell catching Callie’s attention. Then, she squealed and pointed at the big green frog statue among the trees. Of course we talked to the little turtle and climbed around the frog, teaching and learning about all kinds of reptiles.
It suddenly dawned on me as we walked home from the big green frog, how simple and willfully God chooses to love me. I make plans and dream for adventures. He sees me and knows my heart. He doesn’t just squash them all and let me wallow in hopes I learn the defeating cycle of self reliance. No, He teaches me, gently with a wisdom beyond my own imagination. He affirms the goodness of my intentions, He provides even more than I could craft by my own resources, and He does it in His perfect timing. Once again reminding me that it is in Him we seek to find adventure, and the hidden treasures on the journey. For He is the Steward and it is His love that reveals our constant and evergrowing knowledge of the world.
I’m learning to steward well as I live out my new vocation as mother. Every ounce of my virtue is being stretched and molded and made into more. Because when more of me is required in this world, for more people, He equips me. Not all at once, and not without a few growing pains. But I grow all the same. It is indeed a journey, an exploration. One I don’t have to navigate or peruse on my own. Who else to discover the hidden treasures with than the Creator Himself?
x courtney
